“Money mules often receive a commission for their service, or they might provide assistance because they believe they have a trusting or romantic relationship with the individual who is asking for help.” – FBI
“Oh, I could never be groomed.” As a business ethics keynote speaker, national business ethics consultant and ethics book author, I can’t say just how many times I have heard the brag. So, from time to time, I have responded to such self-assuredness by asking: be completely honest, have you ever been lonely or depressed?
For given the life situation or human condition, we are all somewhat vulnerable. We hope, in that vulnerability, a friend or spouse or counselor is there to catch us. However, suppose the person getting close to us in those times is a fraudster; a scam-artist of the highest order?
And, it doesn’t make a bit of difference what we do for a living. Physicians have been groomed; as have bricklayers, teenagers, insurance sales people and police detectives.
To be groomed is to allow another, even a total stranger, to convince us they are our best friend. All they require for this friendship is from time to time, to allow them to ask a simple favor. In fact, it doesn’t even require our money. Who wouldn’t agree to such a “meaningless” gesture from friend to friend?
The money mule
Aricka Sidbury is hardly a naïve person. As a detective in a moderately-sized city, she had pretty much seen it all. Nevertheless, she proved to be as vulnerable as the rest of us. Earlier this year, Detective Sidbury unexpectedly fell under suspicion of financial crimes and was relieved of her duties in April 2023.
She was horrified as her good name was dragged through the mud. She had always upheld the law and she was deeply shamed at the accusations of fraud. Fortunately, she was granted an investigation by the N.C. Conference of District Attorneys and they determined she had inadvertently become a money mule. The case involved fraud that stretched to Marin County, California.
The police had been tracking the detective for nearly six-months prior to April 2023.
According to the Wilmington Star News (August 21, 2023):
“[The] California investigation began when a California business owner’s email account was hacked as he was attempting to send payment to a vendor. The man followed instructions that had been emailed to him and sent $20,000 to someone he thought was a legitimate vendor but was later determined to be an unknown scammer.”
Unfortunately, the scammer had developed an online relationship with Sidbury. The scammer groomed her over the messaging function on Skype and identified himself as “Thompson Octavia.” The innocent connection turned to flirting and developed into an online dating relationship.
As promises were made and the grooming intensified, Sidbury “received and sent money to various financial accounts as directed by Octavia.”
Why hadn’t they gotten together when the relationship allegedly turned romantic?
“Octavia told Sidbury he was working out of the country in France, he had been robbed, and his friends and family were sending him money to help. After a review of the two’s Skype messages, investigators concluded Sidbury had been groomed by Octavia over a months-long period.”
All that was asked
The groomer, who was pursuing Sidbury was not in France by a long stretch, but Fayetteville, Arkansas, and all she had to do was to set up bank accounts for him, make deposit and basically launder the stolen money.
Aricka Sidbury is highly respected in the Wilmington, Delaware area. She was on the police department for 12-years and was honored as “one of Wilmington’s 40 under 40, an award reserved for those in Wilmington who are helping the Cape Fear region prosper.”
However, Sidbury was also lonely and vulnerable. She had a virtual “friend” in Octavia and then a prospective spouse. Ultimately, she became a clueless co-conspirator in an illegal business ethics situation.
As a business ethics keynote speaker, national business ethics consultant and ethics book author, my plea is to be extremely wary of anyone reaching out to shut-in’s, the elderly, the depressed, mentally compromised and lonely.
This need not apply to those “at-home,” but is equally applicable to email, texts or IMs received in work settings. Being groomed is hardly fun, and the realization may be painful but better that than to commit fraud.
